Our first day at the center has come to a close and a great day it was. Being here with the babies puts me completely in my element. While I’m here, they are all mine. I love snuggling with them, kissing on the them, cooing over them and lying on the floor playing with them. My babies are all grown, each of them taller than me, so I love getting the opportunity to be mama to little ones.
What’s different about this trip is these babies aren’t orphans. These babies have families that love them dearly and are broken over the separation. That really hit home with me today. I was holding one of the smaller girls, cooing over her when it struck me all her Mama is missing out on and how incredibly difficult that must be for her. I cannot imagine being unable to care for my child, temporarily turning over custody and only being able to visit once a month. Understanding the circumstances surrounding these babies makes me realize even more how important my time is here.
I don’t know when it will post but I blogged on behalf of the team today. You can watch for it at http://fbchinternationalchildcare.blogspot.com.
Well, I’m here in Antigua, Guatemala. I am happy to report a fairly uneventful trip. Making my connection at DFW and exiting the airport in Guatemala City were somewhat stressful, but everything worked out. The team is huge, 60 members!! I’ve not been part of such a large group on any of my previous trips.
The hotel is about an hour from the airport. Guatemala is gorgeous, reminds me of Haiti, but surprisingly modern. We passed several McDonald’s, Taco Bell, Wendy’s, Shell stations, and even a Wal Mart!! Dinner was tasty; pasta, fish, turkey and lots of fruits and vegetables. I’m always happy when fresh fruits and veggies are available. The water for the shower was tepid, but I’m clean! I was also happy to learn there is a group walk scheduled every morning for anyone that is interested. Ooo, ooo pick me, pick me!!
It’s only 8:00 but I’m plum tuckered out plus typing on a tablet isn’t easy. Until tomorrow. . .
Strength wanes, resolve fades
Emptiness swims behind haunted eyes
Fighter instincts make hasty retreat
Beaten. Weary. Lost.
Failure, once held at bay now leaves destructive carnage
Searches for meaning, discovers blank pages
Comfort; no words can bring
Barbed wire, broken glass, hazardous trail
Darkened sky; no navigational compass, no stars for light
Forward motion futile, barricaded path
No rescue. No escape
Silence explodes, deafening in it’s eerie quiet
Invisible shackles bind her to this place
Coyly taunting, Freedom taps at the windowpane
Writhing, twisting, she struggles to break the bonds
Strong. Determined. Vice-like. They hold.
Spent, she crumbles, still bound, no escape
Precious sleep brings momentary respite
She awakens to hope, but it is fleeting
Heavy chains drape her shoulders, pulled tighter by each careless act
Kindness offered, ne’er returned
Worn. Weary. She stumbles.
Wounded, she cries, weeps wretched tears
Blinded by sorrow, unable to breathe
She looks for purpose
Hidden away in secret depths it remains
Digging, scratching, searching
Bloody, bruised and dirty, she is lost
Lost in a cell she did not choose,
Yearning for a stay of execution